Assertiveness is not a rude word…
Do you have too many people in your life that you put first? Is it often at the cost of what you want to do, feel, say, or show up as?
What if this was someone close to you, or your little one?
If your family see you constantly put your emotional needs, your desires, your views, and your dreams, after everyone else, they often copy you and will do the same in their life. If you wouldn’t want it for them, or a close friend, why do you want this for you?
Whether it is with your family, friends, or relating to yourself, you are important. It may be that this behaviour is only evident in part of your life. Either way, now is a great time to encourage yourself to create a balance, to be even more of you. Say what you mean, and share your needs (aka being assertive ? ).
But I don’t want to be [selfish, mean, horrid, insert your own choice of word here]!
I know that the thought of being assertive can be scary. As with various behaviours we choose in life, it can be because we fear becoming the worst of that trait. If being assertiveness makes you feel uncomfortable, or causes you to feel anxious, do you have an image of someone who is unloving, angry, self-centred? Are you worried that by prioritising yourself, you will become an awful, selfish, aggressive, mean person?
Rest assured, you will still be the truly wonderful, kind, caring, all amazing, you. ?
In fact, you will feel even more so. Competing thoughts and feelings will ease. You will feel lighter, more peaceful, energised, and powerful.
What can I do?
There are numerous great articles (and books) to read on what assertiveness is (and isn’t), with useful practical tips, and how to become more comfortable with it.
I also suggest spending some time reflecting, writing, and looking around, to be clear on what you want assertiveness to look like for you. Find a role model (or models), explore where your fears come from, think about what real evidence supports them, and think about what you need to make it easier for you!
Go on, you can do it – and as always, remember you have One Life, it needs to be Your Life, and it is truly time for you to Live It.
One Life.Your Life.Live It
Simona is a professional mindset coach, trainer, and speaker, working with motivated individuals to create successful, purposeful, and fulfilled lives.
If you are ready to change something in your life, or want to make a big goal happen, apply for your complimentary coaching session to talk to Simona here (limited spaces available) or come along to one of her events. If you want to book Simona for one of your own events, please do get in touch, In the meantime, have an amazing day.